The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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