The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
