let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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