hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Randomize
