Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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