Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
