Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
