just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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