Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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