we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Rumble strips road head = magical
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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