Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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