Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
