Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
