Your face is a jimmy john
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
