cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
