do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Randomize
