i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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