best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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