Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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