so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
