Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize