I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize