im about as happy as oj after his trial
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
