i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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