Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
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