Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
