Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
