You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
No...this little piggys going to the bar
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
