you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
