Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
