Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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