Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Randomize
