Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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