OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
