But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
