Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I party with great urgency now.
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