I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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