i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
