he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
