As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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