I think I died a long time ago.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize