Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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