She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
