She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
