i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
