nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize