nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
