thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
