So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize
