Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
